After going through all this, I finally understood the kind of life experience that
marks people so deeply that they want that lesson forever imprinted upon their skin.
It’s the consummation of the learning process, the physical embodiment of the
patience, endurance, and pain that lead to that new lesson that’s made you all the
wiser and ready to take on more of what life has to offer in the future. It shows
that you’ve been through a little bit of hell and made it back to tell the tale.
Etching a representation of this experience onto your skin closes the chapter, and
reminds you of how strong you were and how strong you can be in future instances of
life.
With this all-new take on tattoos, I set off on my quest to find a design. I would
customize it myself if I had to, but I would end up with something that was uniquely
mine. I didn’t want a generic "tramp stamp" that I would later on need to learn to
put up with – I wanted something that I loved from the very beginning, something
that I would never get sick of, something that stood for me and who I am. As
previously mentioned, I’m a very fickle person, so this task proved to be
exceedingly difficult. I listed all sorts of symbols that I felt represented me
accurately, but somehow none of them lived up to the standard of what I was looking
for. I wasn’t even sure what I was looking for, but I felt that when I found the
ideal design, I would just know.
And I did. One fateful day, a friend asked me what my name – Shadi, which is Farsi
for “joy” – looks like written in Persian, and nobody had a pen for me to write it
down for her. Since we were in the computer lab at the time, I did a Google search
for names in Persian calligraphy, and what started out as an innocent search for my
name ended up as the discovery of my new tattoo. The design was gorgeous, it
involved my Persian background, and it was my name – a word that I have always felt
represents every angle of my personality flawlessly (unlike some people who hate
their names because they don’t feel they fit them accurately). It was perfect.
So how was my tattoo experience? In a nutshell: intense. It began the second I lay
eyes on the design. The instant I knew that this was my future tattoo, the process
began, and it was totally crazy – placement (after much consideration and bouncing
back and forth from lower back to hip, I decided upon lower back), color (plain
black, red outline, purple outline?), design (did I want tribal wings around it? How
about wildflowers and butterflies? Would any of these detract from the name
itself?), there was a lot to decide. After settling on the name alone, plain black,
on my lower back, I began to obsessively research the procedure. I practically
became an expert on everything, from the types of ink used and where it’s deposited
in the skin to what an autoclave is and all the aftercare instructions. Knowing all
this, I set off to inspect the body modification shop, in the company of a friend
who was there to document the adventure on her camera.
